Asking Permission

One time while we were at my grandmother’s house, my brother asked where my kids were. I told him that they went next door to check out the dogs for sale. (My kids love dogs!) My brother asked, “Did they ask permission?” “Yes,” I replied. If you know my children, they will not do anything without asking permission from me or from their dad.

Another time while Raya and I were at the Mother-Daughter activity of her school, all the other kids and classmates started running to the garden after having their snacks. Raya dutifully came to me and asked me first if she could go with her classmates to the garden. I, of course, allowed her to do so. A mother noticed this and was amazed how Raya asked first instead of going with the flow. I just smiled and told her that they were brought up that way.

I don’t really know how we began this practice. I remember that we started with just making them ask permission when they would want to watch TV. At that time, I really wanted to regulate their TV watching and instilled this rule at home. They probably thought it applied to everything else.

It helped that Nadine, our firstborn, is a very conscientious and sensitive child. Since Raya, our next child, idolizes her big sister, she followed suit without questions. Right now, it’s Alyssa who’s learning to ask permission whenever she wants to do something although she needs to be reminded to do so time and again. This 3rd girl is irresistibly adorable but can be irritatingly stubborn when it comes to teaching her. Maybe it’s the toddler stage so more patience is needed on my part. Sigh.

Another key to this habit would probably be our goal to have open communication with the girls and telling them that we, their parents, are genuinely concerned with their welfare and life. We’ve always wanted them to feel free to tell us what they think and how they feel and not to be afraid to express themselves. This, of course, is done with respect. We hope that this will carry through especially when they reach their teenage years.

I must admit, though, that sometimes it can get quite irritating and annoying when they would ask permission for even the most mundane things. But as I was telling Mier, we’ll just have to be patient about this right now and we will reap the rewards later on. I hope that this would be training ground for them when they are older; that they would think twice about doing things they know would not make us happy. And with that they would develop a conscience in doing what is right instead of what their friends think is right. I hope and pray that what we’re doing now would mold them into becoming better people and citizens of the world.

Holdup!

Yes, holdup! That's what I feel right now. I came from the girls' school this morning to buy their books and uniforms and once again I find myself with an empty wallet. Sigh.

I purposely did not enrol, buy their books and uniforms and get their school supplies in one go so it won't be too heavy in the pocket. I enrolled the end of April, got school supplies last weekend and bought the books and uniforms today. But nevertheless, the bank account sure feels the pressure of education. And that's only with two kids in the grade school. What happens when Alyssa starts school? Or when all four of them go to school already? Sigh. Double sigh.

Early this summer we found a school bag for Raya which she liked and we got it right away before we lose it. I talked to Nadine about using her old school bag. Of course, she was disappointed. Who wouldn't want to start the school year with new stuff, right? I explained to her that her old bag is still good and useful. And that Raya, who is entering Grade 1 needs a bigger bag. Nadine reluctantly agreed. I told her she can get the notebooks she wanted (the ones with puppies on the cover). I also said that I will get her what she needs --- new uniforms --- while Raya can wear her old ones. Good thing, Raya is easy to talk to about these things. She herself chose an old pencil case (with elephants, of course!) as her school pencil case.

Both girls will need new shoes and socks too. Not to mention scouting and PE uniforms when classes start. Sigh again.

I wish I had a limitless bank account. But even if I did, I don't want my children to get used to having their way and new things all the time. I want them to learn to be content with what they have. Life won't always be easy and although we'd want to shield them from the harshness of the world, we also need to prepare them for what might be. Such is life.

Alyssa and Ruby

Some months back, Mier got the girls a chihuahua which they named, Ruby. The girls were ecstatic!

When Nadine was younger, she used to be afraid of dogs. I think this was because her yaya then was afraid of dogs and had transferred that fear to her. But Mier, who is a dog lover, slowly helped Nadine overcome this fear. We had a yellow and a black labrador and a rottweiller when we were in Manila and the girls just loved them.

Now with Ruby, the girls are learning responsibility and gentleness. Ruby is very malambing and loves to be cuddled all the time. Here Alyssa shows just how much she adores her puppy. :D

Summer Time with the Kids

We’re right in the middle of the summer and the kids have been bumming around for the most part. So glad that the two older ones are nearly the best friends and don’t really fight as much. The youngest one is a different story. At two years old, she demands her time and wants for everyone to hear much to the dismay of the “ates.” It is a lesson being learned for her to ask properly and learn how to get along with her sisters. Sometimes she complies, sometimes she doesn’t, lots of time-outs for her in the process.

We haven’t been doing much since Recognition and Graduation Day during the last week of March. No travel plans for us this year as being in the family way has made it difficult for me to travel and go around. My in laws were here for Holy Week and we spent a weekend in Opol frolicking in the beach and pigging out on fish, shrimps and crabs. Yum!

Last week, Nadine and Raya once again began their Junior Golf Sessions at the Pueblo de Oro Golf Estates. We were surprised that they expressed interest in golf again as I can still remember their complaints of heat, perspiration and tiredness last summer. But honestly, I’m happy that they wanted to go through it again. We’ve always wanted them to get into sports and this might be the sport they’d be good at.

Although two days after they started, Nadine started complaining about tiredness and muscles aches again. She said she didn’t want to continue golf anymore. I told her that since she hasn’t been using her muscles for a long time it is expected that they would hurt in the first few days but will improve after a while. I reiterated that it isn’t nice to get into something and bail out in the middle of it all. I think after a few more sessions and she’ll start enjoying the game again.

During their first day, we could see that both girls have improved in their form and skill even after months of absence. I think it won’t take long for them to get into the groove again.

Raya has been the busiest among the three girls. Early on she had expressed her desire to take painting and arts lessons being offered in their school. She’s thoroughly enjoying the three times a week session. Likewise, I’ve asked my sister to give her enrichment activities to prepare her for Grade One next school year. So far, so good.

We still have the full month of May to think of other activities to do to keep the girls busy. Then we’ll have to be getting ready for school. How fast time flies!

Baked Chicken with Thyme

Description:
This dish is one of my mom's favorite dishes because it is sooo easy to make. Easy and yummy too!

This goes well with mashed potatoes or potato salald. :-)

Ingredients:
Chicken cut into pieces -- I usually prefer chicken thighs but any part would do.
Pepper
Dried Thyme
Soy sauce

Directions:
1. Wash chicken thoroughly and put in a baking dish
2. Sprinkle pepper and thyme around each part of chicken
3. Put enough soy sauce to soak chicken (but not too much) then leave to marinate for 30 minutes while turning it around.
4. Cook in oven (or I use a turbo broiler) for 45 minutes to an hour.

Things to do During a Brownout

So with the scheduled brownouts now five hours everyday and school  already out, what are we to do to entertain the kids? I’ve always believed that TV and computer shouldn’t be at the center of a child’s life. So here are some activities we do during the brownouts:

• Read – Well, whether there’s electricity or not my kids read everyday so this isn’t anything new. But they do enjoy the time just looking and browsing through their picture books. Nadine reads junior novels already so her time is pre occupied with this.
• Play with their toys – Again, nothing new for my kids. They can spend hours and hours just playing with their toys in their room. Even Alyssa has her own imaginative play already. Yup, the toys are all worth the price.
• Board and card games – I came out of the room one day and saw Nadine and Raya quietly playing Word for Word (similar to Scrabble) then moved on to Chess afterwards. Don’t think they finished their games though but it was nice seeing them do stuff to entertain themselves. They would play their Pokemon cards too or Lucky 9 with ordinary playing cards.
• Give the dog a bath – Or just simple play with the dog. Nadine had fun soaping and washing the dog and getting wet too in the process. She went straight to bathe herself afterwards. Another time, Raya asked permission if she can just stay outside with our dog Max. Mier found her quietly patting the dog and removing the ticks. Hahaha!
• Go to the park – A day at the park definitely spells fun for the kids. They enjoyed the swings, slide, seesaw and monkey bars. You can also pick flowers, blow bubbles, catch insects and kick the ball. Or even fly a kite on a windy day.
• Arts and Crafts Projects – The kids set up a table outside and brought out their paints and crayons. They just drew, colored and painted the afternoon away good thing we bought newsprint paper for the kids to use. Even Alyssa enjoyed drawing and coloring.
• Batya Swimming at the Back – Ahhh, another favorite pastime of my girls. They wouldn’t mind spending countless hours just lazing around in our laundry basins at the back of our house. We ask them to wash their shoes too or choose some stuff toys to bathe too so at least they are cleaning and doing something productive as well.
• Shadow Play – For those nighttime brownouts, the girls created paper puppets and used the back of the couch as their stage. They made stories and came up with little plays. We also made shadow animals with our hands and even Alyssa enjoyed trying to guess the animal.
• Tell Stories – My girls always love hearing how they were born and how they were when they were smaller. We look at photo albums and see how they have grown all these years and read what they use to do.

There are countless other stuff that can be done during the brownouts. We are challenged to be more and more creative to keep the kids entertained especially with the summer rolling in. But I do hope government officials will do something about the power crisis. It isn’t enough to think of stuff to do for the kids but the heat can be unbearable too.

Facebook for Kids?

About a few months back, Nadine was asking if she could get a Facebook account. According to her, a lot of her friends and classmates and cousins have already and she wanted to join the bandwagon. I think the main reason why we had to think twice about this is because the Internet is not entirely safe. And especially for children her age, I would rather that she get into it when she’s a little older already.

But after a lot of thinking, I thought, well, we don’t want her to be left out also with her friends and as long as it’s regulated and supervised maybe it would be ok. Besides, a lot of people I now allow their kids for the games only. And I’ve read about an article how parents can monitor their children through Facebook. But when we tried signing up, we found out that there is an age limit --- only for people who are 13 and above.

What did this mean? All these classmates and friends and cousins of hers have changed their ages so that they can get Facebook account. With this information, we decided that no, we would not let her join Facebook. We don't want to teach her to be dishonest even if it is as simple as changing her age just so she can get what she wants. The minimum age requirement was put there for a good reason.

Now I don’t want to sound high and mighty or righteous about this. I just feel that sometimes we aren’t aware that our actions are magnified heavily by our children. As they say, children live by example. And what lesson will she be learning if we allow her this Facebook account?

I know that this is just a simple case but will teach her values that I hope she will adopt in the long run. It isn’t easy to be a parent. We have to choose our battles and our actions carefully because these have an impact on our children. But we have to do it because they are our responsibility. In the end, I want to face my God and tell him that I did all that I could to bring up a good and upstanding person.