Remembering Marites

She would grace parent-teacher conferences, come to school gatherings and bring her boys to school wearing her signature bandana. No, she wasn't making a fashion statement. It was to cover her falling hair, a well-known effect from her chemotherapy. She was undergoing treatment for a recurrence of her breast cancer. This was last year when her twin boys, Kenneth and Kevin, were classmates of Nadine in preschool.

In May this year, she was asking me for advice about sending her boys to a different school. Because of her aching back, her doctors did a bone scan and discovered another tumor. This would entail another round of chemotherapy, another set of expenses.

I got to visit her sometime in July with some other mothers from the school. It was a nice morning of chatting and eating. She seemed in high spirits and would talk about her pain but never dwelling on it. She was always smiling, always active. You wouldn’t think that something was bothering her. She would only ask for prayers.

Since then I would constantly think about her and say a prayer for her. Though her boys went to another school, she would ask me about dentist appointments and I would text her about party happenings. I had always planned to see her again but never really got the chance. I know I should have done it.

Last Friday, Mier informed me that Marites was brought to the hospital earlier that week and was in a bad shape already. We decided to visit her that same night. I called up a fellow parent and immediately asked for a phone brigade to say a prayer for Marites.

When we got to the hospital, nothing prepared me to see her in her bed with different tubes attached to her and a respirator helping her breathe. Her eyes were dilated, probably from the morphine that helped her deal with her pain. I got teary eyed right away to see her like that. Gone was her smile.

We stayed awhile and met her sister who just arrived from the US. We chatted with some other relatives and her helper just to ask how she’s doing and how the boys were.

And then all of a sudden there was a commotion. Some relatives came and were checking on her only to realize that she had stopped breathing. They checked her pulse and felt her clammy skin. Then reality set in --- she passed away amidst all the people in the room, with no fanfare, no attention to herself. She left quietly, so typical of Marites.

As relatives broke down and started weeping in the room, I tried to be strong and did my best in hugging and consoling them. I hardly knew them but we were all one in our grief. I looked at her boys who had just lost their mother and my heart just went out to them. So young to experience all this! It was only when we left the room to go home did I allow myself to let the tears flow. I cried for her. I cried for her life lost at such a young age. I cried for her motherless boys.

I will miss her. I will miss her smile and her sweet nature. But I know she is in peace now in the bosom of Jesus. No more pain, no more suffering. Only joy and bliss! And I am consoled.