Thoughts on Home Schooling and Others

I’ve always believed that the home is a child’s first and foremost school. This is where they learn the basics of life --- how to behave, initial values and principles, etc. Parents are, therefore, a child’s first teachers.

My two older girls learned how to identify shapes and colors, to count, and to name the parts of their bodies way before stepping into a classroom. Our house is surrounded with various books, art materials and music. And like her older sisters, my 21-month old is learning all these things right now.

So I believe that I’ve “home schooled” in a way since here was their first learning venue. The question was what to do when they reach school age so that we can continue what has been started in the home and build on the previous skills learned.

I remember when I gave birth to Raya, I wanted Nadine, then aged 2, to start in a toddler school so she would have some other activity and socialization with other kids. (It turned out that she wasn’t ready for it and we pulled her out. But that’s another story.J) Aside from continuing her academic formation, I wanted her to develop social skills with kids her age.

Nadine formally started preschool at 2 years and 10 months. Raya, on the other hand, started at 2 years and 10 days because she wanted to join Nadine in going to school everyday. It was fortunate for us that their school was just a few houses away from ours in Manila so it was so easy for us.

There was a time, in a conversation with the school’s directress, she asked me if I would consider home schooling my girls since this was a growing trend in the Philippines and she saw how involved I am in their upbringing.

I thought a lot about it. Seriously, I know deep in my heart that I would be able to do well in home schooling if I do decide to pursue it. But I felt that there is more to just having my kids in the four walls of a classroom. Learning how to interact with other kids in a school setting (in a daily basis) can teach them in developing skills at listening, being patient and taking turns which are essential to a blossoming personality. They may encounter undesirable friends or experiences but these are all opportunities of learning and growth. (That is why a parent’s involvement in a child’s life whether in school or in any other setting is very essential)

Likewise, I believed that it is important for children to have other authority figures other than the parents. In a school, they not only interact with their peers, they have constant interaction with other authorities such as teachers, librarians, as well as, guards and janitors.

But this doesn’t mean that we turn over the reigns of teaching to the school. The home is still the main seat of learning. We, as parents, are life-long teachers and models for our children.

The challenge, therefore, is to look for a school that has parent collaboration as one of its thrusts. I was fortunate to find a PAREF school here in Cagayan de Oro. PAREF is short for Parents for Education Foundation Inc. and involves parents in the wholistic formation of their children. There are periodic chats between a mentor with the student and also with the parents. In these personal conversations, both the school and the parents can collaborate in the overall development of the child’s growth and can assure greater harmony between the home and the school. Many parents do not understand this and have transferred their children to other schools where they feel can “teach” their kids more.

Another thing I like about a PAREF school is that enrollment is not the priority. The aim is for a small teacher-student ratio in the classrooms and they continue to keep student count at 20 maximum for every section. When we transferred here 2 years ago, Raya had only four classmates in the afternoon session and Nadine had 8.

Honestly, I don’t think there is a perfect school. Parents will always have something to complain about or be unhappy about. It’s just a matter of making the most of what is there and what you want.